Hangover remedies: because life is a vicious cycle that keeps going round and round and round…till you hit rock bottom and fall face-flat to the ground. Wait, that’s just the Jager Bombs you chugged last night.
Saturday night is vaguely visible in the near future (always) and you know exactly how it’s going to turn out. You’re going to dress up, drink up, party all night, throw up (if you’re not of legal drinking age) and pass out. The next morning is a hazy blur as thousands of hammers bang the insides of your head with every move you make. You hope for some kind of saving grace to take you out of your misery. You feel like a wandering soul walking for days on end on an isolated desert in search of ultimate nirvana, that would be you getting out of bed to reach that chilled glass of water. We give you seven magical remedies for when you need to get over your hangover.
CHOCOLATE
Already loving our list, aren’t you? Believe it or not, research says that chocolate makes the toxicity of alcohol neutral. Thus, bringing you back to your before-getting-hammered state, to some level. Besides, who doesn’t love a morning sugar-high and that awesome feeling when you’re in bed and the bar simply melts in your mouth? (don’t let your thoughts wander, please) If nothing, the sugar rush will at least will help muster up the energy to reach that cold glass of water. Before stepping out for drinks, we suggest you keep a Hersheys bar on your nightstand because you will need it sooner than later.
BLAND FOOD
Ugh! Just the thought of that makes you want to barf out the wine you drank like water last night. But what follows a heavy drinking night is a stomach that is very upset and knows not what to do. Bland toasties, green leaves (double ugh!), healthy eggs and other easily digestible foods will help you summon up the courage to look yourself in the mirror and not want to hang yourself to end the wretchedness.

GREASY FOOD
Those who have given up after reading about bland food don’t lose hope just yet. While a big fat bacon and cheese burger will not help that already weakened tummy of yours, if such foods are eaten within the first hour of waking up, it helps take in as much carbs and vitamins from the meal as possible. Besides, your head might forget all about last night with a whiff of freshly baked waffles, right?
EXERCISE
If you can manage to get out of bed AFTER eating that bar of chocolate AND gulping down that glass of water AND eating a platter full of greasy breakfast (we know you want to go back to bed just thinking about it and can’t fathom why the word ‘exercise’ exists in the dictionary), then exercising is probably the best way to start your day fresh. Sweating out all that beer seems like a task but the release of endorphins after a great workout will help in a happier state of mind, leaving you feeling fresh as a daisy.
WATER
The simplest, most effective way to cure a hangover is to drink plenty of water to hydrate your system. Adding salt, sugar and lime to it will help replenish the body with sodium and glycogen and energise you.
Tip: Drink a few glasses of water after a heavy drinking night, before going off to sleep to fight dehydration.
A COLD SHOWER
You have to believe us when we say standing under the shower feels like heaven’s blessing through cold water falling on your head. It will wash down last night’s effect; only, you need to drag yourself out of bed to be able to feel that heavenly touch.
SEX
Sex, in large quantities may not take away last night’s regretful memories but it sure will help you move out of your hangover from hell and make you feel a whole lot better. Tip: the lesser hungover partner can be on top, and do all the work, while the more hungover partner enjoys the ride.
Did you really think you can ‘magically’ cure a hangover? Clearly, you haven’t met Mr. JD.